Lily puts herself in positions to help other people so that she can hide from her own problems.
Full Circle
Lily Bloom is a young woman that grew up in an abusive household. She promised herself she would never end up like her mother, that was until she met Ryle Kincaid. It Ends With Us by Colleen Hoover tells Lily’s story. Lily’s problems started when she was younger, she watched her father beat her mother continuously and learned that he would go easier on her mother if she was around. This is why she began putting herself in other people’s issues and trying to help them before helping herself. Lily puts herself in positions to help other people so that she can hide from her own problems.
It all started when she met Atlas, he was a homeless boy who lived across the street from her. She noticed he was living in the house next to her’s and decided to bring him some food the next day. This jump started their relationship because he used her house to shower and stay warm during the winter. Although what she did benefitted Atlas, helping Atlas also served as a distraction from her own life. When she was with Atlas, she did not have to think about her parent’s relationship, she could focus on her own. After Atlas left for Boston, Lily fell into a depression. She was not able to talk to anybody about her problems and felt extremely lonely. Not only that, but she was not able to distract herself as much anymore because everything that she did reminded her of Atlas. That is what drove her passion for gardening, it seems like Lily’s only real outlet for her emotions.
This happens again when she goes to college. She was still hung up on Atlas and she was waiting for him to come back and find her. Although she knew that this was unlikely, in the back of her mind she always thought that he would come back for her. She began to distract herself with short term relationships. This was the thing that drove Atlas away, he saw her with another man and did not want to intrude on her relationship. When he explains all of this to her she reminisces and thinks “He was just a boy that I dated for six months. He never even made me feel a fraction of what I had felt for Atlas”(305). Lily struggles with facing her problems and always chooses to cover them up. If she had realized how much she wanted Atlas in her life, she could have found him.
Finding Atlas would have saved Lily a lot of heartache, because instead of living a happy life with him, she met Ryle. Ryle seemed like the perfect man, he was kind, loving, rich, and handsome. Lily fell head over heels in love with him, she only started to doubt him when she came face to face with his temper. Once he shoved Lily, she cursed herself for not being able to leave him, but at the same time, she was convinced that he would never do it again. After it happened a few more times, he opened up to her about his childhood trauma. Once again, Lily put Ryle’s issues over her own and distracted herself from the fact that he was putting her in danger. This makes it so much harder for her to leave him, because now she has another excuse to stay. No matter how he treats her, there is always a voice telling her that it was partially her fault and that she should forgive him because that was easier than leaving.
When she leaves Ryle and has her baby, it helps heal her. She realizes that she is strong enough to fix her problems instead of putting them off. She begins taking life into her own hands and starts raising a beautiful daughter. She divorces Ryle and starts a new relationship with Atlas. Although she struggled with facing her issues, it is something that she inherited from her mother when she was younger. Overall, Lily had an unhealthy way of coping with her traumas, but in the end, don’t we all?
It all started when she met Atlas, he was a homeless boy who lived across the street from her. She noticed he was living in the house next to her’s and decided to bring him some food the next day. This jump started their relationship because he used her house to shower and stay warm during the winter. Although what she did benefitted Atlas, helping Atlas also served as a distraction from her own life. When she was with Atlas, she did not have to think about her parent’s relationship, she could focus on her own. After Atlas left for Boston, Lily fell into a depression. She was not able to talk to anybody about her problems and felt extremely lonely. Not only that, but she was not able to distract herself as much anymore because everything that she did reminded her of Atlas. That is what drove her passion for gardening, it seems like Lily’s only real outlet for her emotions.
This happens again when she goes to college. She was still hung up on Atlas and she was waiting for him to come back and find her. Although she knew that this was unlikely, in the back of her mind she always thought that he would come back for her. She began to distract herself with short term relationships. This was the thing that drove Atlas away, he saw her with another man and did not want to intrude on her relationship. When he explains all of this to her she reminisces and thinks “He was just a boy that I dated for six months. He never even made me feel a fraction of what I had felt for Atlas”(305). Lily struggles with facing her problems and always chooses to cover them up. If she had realized how much she wanted Atlas in her life, she could have found him.
Finding Atlas would have saved Lily a lot of heartache, because instead of living a happy life with him, she met Ryle. Ryle seemed like the perfect man, he was kind, loving, rich, and handsome. Lily fell head over heels in love with him, she only started to doubt him when she came face to face with his temper. Once he shoved Lily, she cursed herself for not being able to leave him, but at the same time, she was convinced that he would never do it again. After it happened a few more times, he opened up to her about his childhood trauma. Once again, Lily put Ryle’s issues over her own and distracted herself from the fact that he was putting her in danger. This makes it so much harder for her to leave him, because now she has another excuse to stay. No matter how he treats her, there is always a voice telling her that it was partially her fault and that she should forgive him because that was easier than leaving.
When she leaves Ryle and has her baby, it helps heal her. She realizes that she is strong enough to fix her problems instead of putting them off. She begins taking life into her own hands and starts raising a beautiful daughter. She divorces Ryle and starts a new relationship with Atlas. Although she struggled with facing her issues, it is something that she inherited from her mother when she was younger. Overall, Lily had an unhealthy way of coping with her traumas, but in the end, don’t we all?